ಅತ್ತಲಿತ್ತ ಹೋಗದಂತೆ ಹೆಳವನ ಮಾಡಯ್ಯಾ ತಂದೆ, ಸುತ್ತಿ ಸುಳಿದು ನೋಡದಂತೆ ಅಂಧಕನ ಮಾಡಯ್ಯಾ ತಂದೆ, ಮತ್ತೊಂದ ಕೇಳದಂತೆ ಕಿವುಡನ ಮಾಡಯ್ಯಾ ತಂದೆ, ನಿಮ್ಮ ಶರಣರ ಪಾದವಲ್ಲದೆ ಅನ್ಯ ವಿಷಯಕ್ಕೆಳಸದಂತೆ ಇರಿಸು, ಕೂಡಲಸಂಗಮದೇವಾ.
The lines above are from a Vachana (spiritual prose/poetry) of Sri BasavaNa, which mean ‘Make me lame so that I don't wander away (from you), make me blind so that I don't see anything (other than you), Make me deaf so that I don't hear anything (other than your praise) - which he wrote nearly nine hundred years ago. I have no idea if god acceded to his request and made him blind or deaf. But he made me deaf even though I did not request any such favour ! And he made a clumsy job of it. Instead of making me totally deaf, he only made me deaf in one ear and kept the other ear partly open.
Because of his half hearted attempt, I was hearing some things and not hearing some. And it was not my choice. He decided what I heard and what I missed, but I got the blame for what I missed. My wife complained that I heard everything except what she spoke. I wanted to say that it was the best part of being partly deaf but better sense prevailed and I kept my mouth shut.
It was in this situation that my cousin made an appearance. These days no one visits others casually. This fellow happened to be near my house on some errand and he decided to see me. We were talking. My wife said something. He heard it and I did not. My wife made a big fuss which was good because my cousin took leave almost immediately. But before leaving he took out his hearing aid which was his latest acquisition, exhibited it proudly, spoke highly of its virtues and left after suggesting that I get one too.
So, that is how I ended up sitting in front of an audiologist like a sheep, my eyes closed, a headphone on my head, nodding whenever he tapped the table with his pen. He made a chart and handed it over with an estimate for the hearing aid. It was three times my monthly pension. I wasn’t prepared to spend so much for the inconvenience of wearing a hearing aid. I sat over it for more than six months. But ultimately I had to succumb because my wife was determined to make me hear her words again, expenses be damned.
So now, I am the proud owner of a hearing equipment an inch long with a slender wire dangling from one end. It looked like it was going to disintegrate if I sneezed and I mentioned that. But the audiologist said it comes with a two year warranty and taped my mouth. Now, I have to balance the body behind my ear and push the wire inside my ear. I have managed to do that and am waiting to see if my wife’s words register in my brain.
But I am in a difficult situation. You see, I have paid an astronomical sum for the hearing aid and I want it to work. At the same time I feel I was better off being part deaf and would have liked to remain so, following BasavaNNa. Another trouble is, now that I have the aid in my ear, my wife thinks that her words are appearing crystal clear in my brain. If I don't get what she said, it is not because of anything being wrong with my hearing aid but because I have no intention to listen to her. It is a lose, lose situation !


