Saturday, May 13, 2017

Can Your Age Mask Your Stupidity?

I was in the clinic doing nothing worthwhile. One of the consultants who visits my clinic was attending to a patient. It was a young boy and his parents were standing closeby, anxiously watching what was going on. (Though all they could see was the back of the consultant’s head).  I had nothing to do. In fact, there was no need for me to be in the clinic at all but my patients feel better if I am around. This is not my statement. Patients say that! God knows what makes them feel so, it blows up my head! Well, anyway, In such a situation, I either occupy myself writing some nonsense like this and forcing it on others or if I cannot conceive anything, try to be harmless with reading a book or listening to some music on my laptop.  

It was the same scene yesterday. I put on some music, plugged my ears with the earpiece and was listening. ( I don’t like these ear plugs.They keep falling off my ears and I have to repeatedly push them in and hold my head in one particular position to keep them in place. But I have to use them because of the presence of others in the clinic and what I listen to, may not be ‘music’ to their ears!). It was a lively classical composition of carnatic style and without my knowledge my fingers were tapping on the table.  My consultant asked me what was so interesting and I disconnected the earphone and put the speaker on for a moment so that she could hear and appreciate it. By then somebody called at the door and I switched the music off and went out to answer.

I returned after few minutes, placed the earphones in my ears again and switched the music on. It was now  hindustani classical, ‘Bhairavi’ By Panditi Bhimsen Joshi. Usually Pandit Joshi’s  rendition is robust but here, I felt that the sound was very low. I increased the volume. Now, I could hear the music but felt it would sound better if the volume was even higher. There must have been something wrong with the recording. I turned the volume to full and felt that was OK. The consultant raised her head and looked at me. I smiled and signalled it was fine. She and the boy’s parents exchanged some words but I concentrated on the music and did not interfere.

Some time later my son entered the clinic. He is also a dentist and he puts in a cameo appearance in my clinic now and then. The consultant who was working was his good friend. As soon as he entered he covered his ears with his palms, came close to me and said


“What is wrong with you? Why have you kept the volume so high?”
“There is something wrong with this stupid YOU TUBE, the sound is very low. I can hardly hear anything”

“What do you mean  low? I could hear it in the next room and came to see what is happening”

Then he looked at the lap top and said

“Wah, No wonder the volume is low. You have put the earphones in your ears but haven’t connected them to the laptop. You are the one who is stupid. Not YOU TUBE”

Then the tube in my head clicked on. I had detached the earphone from the computer so that the consultant could hear the music but later I had not connected it again. I had only plugged my ears with the earphones and had switched the music on. The faint sound that I was hearing was actually the blaring lap top, filtered by my ear plugs! Thinking that something was wrong with the recording I had taken the volume beyond the tolerable limit of others and they had been politely bearing with the volume and my stupidity.

I was very much embarrassed for having made a fool of myself. I switched the music off, took out the ear pieces and addressed everybody present.

“ I am so sorry. It was so stupid of me. I did not notice that I haven’t connected the earphones to the computer” And to save my face, I added

“ I think it is my age”  ( I completed sixty last september and am now allowed a reasonable margin in my social behaviour)

My son smiled and bent low

“Good try” he whispered “ but you can’t always mask your stupidity with your age!”  

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Naayi Bandaavo Benhatti .......... (Dogs Are Behind Me)


The four stalwarts out of the eight title holders of the first 250 mts of my walking path.
It is five in the morning. Still dark outside. Though the summer makes the interiors stuffy, outdoors is refreshingly cool.  As I step out, I can feel the scent of the jasmines wafting in the air. I stop for a few seconds to enjoy the fragrance and start walking. I turn into the only road around my house that is not yet dug up for laying the sewerage pipes. I am surprised to find my muscles and joints not protesting my attempt of a brisk walk. May be they are still sleeping. I decide to utilize the opportunity and start jogging very slowly so as not to wake them up and proceed cautiously along the edge of the road. A part of my brain starts chanting the “Sahasranama” a sacred verse, which I have by heart, and which is now almost involuntary. (Sahasranaama once is twenty minutes. I don’t need a watch to keep time of my run!)  The other Part gives way to many of the flippant and useless thoughts that occupy the mind when there is nothing else. To put it in short, I am chanting, I am lost in my thoughts and am jogging peacefully.


Suddenly there is a sharp bark close to me and a street dog which might have been lurking unseen amongst the heap of mud and trash by the roadside  jumps up on me. My heart skips a beat, my chanting stops (and I forget where I was), brain shifts in an instant from peaceful to dreadful thoughts. I stop in my tracks and attempt to scare the dog away by shouting at it. I try to show that I am not scared but  have started sweating and my legs are shaking. The dog also stops in its tracks and looks at me with a very innocent face as if questioning me “why are you shouting?”. It walks back to its heap of mud and curls up as if nothing happened.


Nothing happened to the dog. But my pleasant morning and the peaceful reverie is shattered. Now all my senses are alert looking for other unseen dogs which I imagine lurking behind the fences and shrubs and I can’t make myself chant or jog anymore. I am jarred. I start walking wearily and curse myself for not getting my stick along. Not that it would have made any difference. I don't think I am capable using a stick against street dogs effectively. I would have just felt better. But the stick has its disadvantages too. It attracts attention. I have noticed that dogs which just ignore other walkers, bark at me when I pass by carrying a stick. And a stick is Ok if you are walking. If you suddenly shift to jogging (as I often do ), it is a hindrance and sometimes tends to get entangled with your legs.  In spite of all these, I do feel better with a stick in my hand.

People who know dogs and their ways tell me that I should take it easy and the dog did not mean any harm. It was bored spending the night alone and just jumped at me to express happiness over finding company and tried to exchange pleasantries. May be. But I am bugged.

I am jealous about people who can get pally with dogs. I meet a gentleman who comes walking on the same road everyday. As soon as he is seen at a distance, the dogs run towards him vigorously wagging their tails and without barking. They prance around him and he bends down, pats them on the head, mumbles something in their ears and proceeds on his walk. The dogs come back smiling as if blessed and if I happen to be close by, growl at me and go back to their places. I am not as gifted. Hence I prefer to maintain my distance. My policy is just peaceful coexistence. I never trouble them and expect similar courtesy in return. But how will I make them understand?

The stretch of road which I love and on which the dogs have ownership rights.
Not that they are intent up on troubling me always. I am fated to be troubled by them! I will tell you what happened yesterday. The road I go walking  is about a kilometre long. I walk up and down the road several times making up the distance that I want to cover.  There are four groups of dogs along the road and they have divided it amongst themselves into four parts. Each group claims a territory of about 250 mtrs and they zealously guard their territory. When I started jogging yesterday there were about two dogs of each group sleeping next to the road guarding their places. I finished a full lap passing all eight dogs twice and they left me to myself. I finished one lap and turned about for the second. Just as I turned the Pavwala (fellow who sells bread) came along on his bicycle and one of the street dogs, which is his pet, ran in front of the bicycle. The moment this dog got into the next territory all hell broke loose. There was a lot of barking yelping and fighting. I was jogging just behind the pavwala. Luckily for me the dogs were busy with themselves and did not notice me. But the noise thus created alerted the dogs of the next territory and they came charging on to the road barking and baring their teeth, eager for a good fight.  By then the pavwala turned back and his dog (which was the cause of disturbance) went back with him.The charged up dogs which came rushing on to the road saw their target disappearing at a distance but found me on the road instead. Since they did not like to loose the pent up charge they decided to make do with me for their target practice! All of them rushed forward baying for my blood. I had to do a lot of waving the stick and dancing on the road before they reluctantly gave up and went back.
A lone watchman of the third territory.
What I mean to say is it is just my fate and I have to be resigned to it. Santa Shishunaala Sharif must have had similar experiences in his life with dogs. That is why he compared his fellow men who barked at him for no reason to street dogs and composed his song  “Naayi Bandaavo Benhatti”.


Shishunaala Sharif was a 19 th century saint poet, who was born a Muslim and who took a Hindu Guru. Both the teacher and disciple are said to have worked for the unity of the two communities. The guru, Govinda Bhatta was accused by the hindus because he took a muslim disciple and Sharif was targeted by muslims because he accepted a hindu guru. (In a way they succeeded in uniting the two communities - in hating the 'Guru - Shishya' combine!) Sharifa called it 'barking for the sake of barking', ignored them and compared them to street dogs in his famous composition, 'Naayi Bandaavo benhatti'.

“Naayi bandaavo benhatti, naaraayaNa, naayi Bandaavo benhatti.
Naayi andare naayi alla, maanava janmada heena naayi,
Jnaanaananda tiLiyadantha shwaanaanandadoLu dundhe”


“Barking dogs are chasing me, Oh god, dogs are chasing me.
Not the street dogs but wretched human dogs,
Who can't experience the bliss of enlightenment but enjoy acting like street dogs!"

This song is one of my favourites and I wanted to provide a link to the song. Though I tried my best I could not find it. I only got a 'Disco' version which I hate but could not upload even that. Hence I decided to sing myself. Sorry for the assault on your senses. Please close your eyes and ears and listen with your heart. That may help you forgive me! And if it is any solace, I did not sing the full song, only the first two verses. (If you are lucky, your mobile will refuse to recognise my video and you will not hear the song!)